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Without the book, all I can say is to realize that any repetition of words and structures will stand out to your reader, and make sure that their standing-out emphasizes your point instead of just being confusing. Your best best is to read everything they’ve written, your second best bet is to listen to me fumblingly try to explain it.

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When you come to “largest military”, there’s an immediate mental callback to “largest population”, but you’re not sure why and it’s just distracting. It could be solved by changing the second use to “those neighbors”, which sort of telegraphs that you know you’re repeating “neighbors” and did it on purpose.You want people to be going – “okay, insight, good, another insight, good, another insight, good” and then eventually you can tie all of the insights together into a high-level insight. For example, the “now” that comes just after C is saying something like “Take a step back, I’m about to tell you something that might otherwise be controversial, but listen to what I have to say”.Then you can start over, until eventually at the end you tie all of the high-level insights together. If they’re just following a winding stream of thought wherever it’s going, it’ll take a lot more mental work and they’ll get bored and wander off. And the “likewise” just after P means something like “We just got down talking about not-A because P, here’s another argument with about the same structure”.For example, I stole the Last Psychiatrist’s style of section breaks – bold headers saying I., II., III., etc.Now instead of just paragraph breaks, you have two forms of break – paragraph break and section break. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important. When I was talking about SSRIs, I mentioned study after study after study – and then, around the middle, I told a kind of funny story about the time I had a job interview with the author of one of the studies.But it’s kind of funny to be starting with what sounds like a pretty dry academic idea (“how people evaluate arguments for their beliefs” and whether the process is broken), and then confound expectations with an exaggerated (well, maybe) warning about it dooming us all.The phrase “may or may not doom us all” does the same thing on a smaller scale: “may or may not” is a pretty reserved, careful sounding phrase, whereas “doom us all” is obviously the opposite of reserved (I also like the similar construction “it might have sort of kind of been the worst idea ever”).Sometimes this is as simple and as dumb as putting Roman numeral one, Roman numeral two, etc at natural breaks in the article, and then your brain thinks “Oh, I guess there are two different things here”. Eating a foreign cuisine can be exciting because it’s so different from your usual fare; eating hot lava is even more different than your usual fare, but no longer fun. I started with “if” three times in a row, and it didn’t sound bad at all! Deliberate use of parallelism is okay and even commendable.But other times you actually have to vary the reading experience. Include links, so that the never-ending stream of black text on white background is broken up with some pretty blue. Play around with flow and variety, but never break the flow in a jarring way. Usually this involves using the same structure to call attention to certain differences.Although China has tried to reassure its neighbors of its peaceful intentions, they remain unconvinced. It’s things that aren’t a joke in the laugh-out-loud told-by-a-comedian sense, but still put the tiniest ghost of a smile on your reader’s face while they’re skimming through them.This is hard and really deserves a book-length treatment. I learned this art from Dave Barry and Scott Adams, both of whom are humor writers and use normal macrohumor, but both of whom pepper the spaces in between jokes with microhumor besides.Finishing a paragraph or section gives people a micro-burst of accomplishment and reward. It could be as simple as: Notice the underlined words holding up the structure of the argument.It helps them chunk the basic insight together and remember it for later. Not only is the argument nice and tight, but the role of each part in the whole is telegraphed beforehand.Again, the clickbaiters are our gurus – they intersperse images throughout their content. If you are very desperate, italicize certain words to simulate the stresses of normal speech and turn the visual experience into a visual-auditory experience. And if you have to break a flow, make it the flow of your sentence, or the flow of your paragraph, but not the flow of ideas. He was in the shower today when he slipped and fell. You can tell if something is good parallelism by saying it aloud.The images aren’t always very useful, they don’t always add much, but now it’s not just a wall of text. Vary the form of your sentences, as per Gary Provost: This sentence has five words. I agonize a lot about where it is versus isn’t appropriate to break the flow of ideas. When I say the paragraph above aloud, I’m using special intonation, especially in the places where the sentences differ (ie “two”, “three or four”, “whole paragraph’s worth”).




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